Monday, October 19, 2009

Making the Cut

So I have slowly been nixing traditions. First it was the cake. I LOVE cake, don't get me wrong. And there will most certainly be cake upon cake upon cake. What I am referring to is the cake CUTTING. I was watching yet another wedding show one day and realized that I had no idea WHY people cut cake at a wedding. I realize it's a "tradition" but does any couple actually take the time to research the tradition or do they just do it because that's what people do at weddings. Well, I decided awhile back that I wouldn't do anything just because "people do that at weddings". Instead I would research traditions and see where they developed. If they matched with our beliefs and our personalities then they would make the cut. Cake cutting did not, needless to say, make the cut.

Here's what I found out:

"The wedding cake has been an important part of the wedding celebration since Roman times when a thin wheat cake, representing bounty, was crumbled over the bride's head to ensure her fertility." (weddingbasics)

"History tells us that breaking the bread symbolized the breaking of the bride's virginal state and the subsequent dominance of the groom over her." (Hudson Valley Weddings)

or another version:

"The cake-cutting practice was first created to symbolize the shift of the bride's responsibilities and obligation from one family to another. The bride would make slices and then feed these pieces to the groom's family, indicating that she now served them." (1weddingsource)

I am sure that this is not what most couples and their families think about during the cake cutting ceremony but I just wouldn't feel right including this tradition into the reception. I haven't had my (hem hem) v-card for quite some time now and I'm not big on the whole servitude thing! Plus, people will hopefully be too busy shakin' it on the dance floor that they won't care about watching me smear frosting all over my new husband's face.

UPDATE: I don't want to give anyone a complex about their own wedding tradition decisions. Just because it's not right for me doesn't mean that it isn't right for you. If the cake ceremony is important to you then you could even come up with a whole NEW reason for doing it and start a new tradition!

{cake image source}


Stacy Marie said...

Ugh, what a terrible thing to have behind a tradition! We nixed the not-seeing-the-bride-before-the-wedding thing because of the barbaric nature of it (the whole arranged marriage thing), but this is even worse! Thanks for the heads up, I'll def have to discuss this with my fiance.

anna and the ring said...

Yay for the nixing! I find it incredulous that people still just aimlessly follow tradition for the sake of tradition.